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"I think a good novel would be where a bunch of men on a ship are looking for a whale. They look and look, but you know what? They never find him. And you know why they never find him? It doesn't say. The book leaves it up to you, the reader, to decide. Then, at the very end, there's a page you can lick and it tastes like Kool-Aid."

—Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts], Recurring Saturday Night Live comedy bit

 

World News From BBC

Gecko sex satellite back in touch  Mon, 28 Jul 2014 14:47:58 GMT
Fears recede over the fate of a Russian space satellite carrying gecko lizards as part of a sex experiment, after ground control restores contact. 
Liberia shuts borders to curb Ebola  Mon, 28 Jul 2014 14:40:50 GMT
Most border crossings in Liberia are closed and communities hit by an Ebola outbreak face quarantine to stop the virus spreading. 
'Brain hub predicts negative events'  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 00:40:42 GMT
Scientists have identified a part of the brain that may help us predict when things are about to go wrong and could play a part in depression. 
La Liga 'wants all of world's best'  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 10:48:14 GMT
The president of La Liga wants to attract the world's best players to Spain and rival the financial power of the Premier League. 
Van Gaal to bide time over new faces  Mon, 28 Jul 2014 23:29:51 GMT
Manchester United boss Louis van Gaal will not rush to make signings despite "having" to play with wing-backs recently. 
Germany's super-shy super-rich  Sun, 27 Jul 2014 23:31:29 GMT
Why do some of Germany's wealthiest families dodge the limelight and avoid conspicuous consumption? 
The people who want to be near a tornado  Sat, 26 Jul 2014 22:58:37 GMT
In the US, the number of people who chase tornados is growing - why do they put themselves in danger? 
Gold medallist fails drugs test  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 11:19:50 GMT
Weightlifting gold medallist Chika Amalaha of Nigeria is provisionally suspended from Commonwealth Games for failing a drugs test. 
Australia approves $15.5bn coal mine  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 07:30:16 GMT
Australia approves a $15.5bn (£9bn) coal project despite concern over its potential environmental impact, including on the Great Barrier Reef. 
Kosovo ex-rebels 'should face trial'  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 10:45:58 GMT
An EU war crimes prosecutor accuses ex-Kosovo Liberation Army (KLA) commanders of grave offences in the 1999 war against Serbia. 
UN blacklists N Korea arms ship firm  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 03:53:30 GMT
The UN blacklists the operator of a North Korean ship seized near the Panama Canal in July 2013 with undeclared Cuban weapons on board. 
France offers Iraq Christians asylum  Mon, 28 Jul 2014 14:59:45 GMT
France says it is ready to offer asylum to Iraqi Christians forced to flee by Islamic State militants holding the Iraqi city of Mosul. 
LA Clippers sale 'can go ahead'  Mon, 28 Jul 2014 23:11:35 GMT
A US judge rules that the LA Clippers basketball team can be sold, despite the objections of banned co-owner Donald Sterling. 
Boyfriend killed six-week-old baby  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 12:28:22 GMT
A man who killed his girlfriend's six-week-old baby by battering him with a shoe and plastic bottle is found guilty of manslaughter. 
Refunds after Games travel problems  Tue, 29 Jul 2014 10:35:22 GMT
People who missed Commonwealth Games events due to transport problems in and around Glasgow at the weekend are told they can apply for refunds.